Scribbling Dame

Preposterous Pondering.

The Mother of all Fears August 1, 2012

Filed under: Mommy Issues — Scribbling Dame @ 8:43 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,

We have rounded the corner on month four of keeping two children alive. So far so good. Ellie is finally taking a bottle (I never thought someone would love my boobs more than my husband…) and Sofia is enjoying her summer shenanigans (which includes getting into minor trouble for saying potty words under the table at school–don’t know where she picks this stuff up from…ahem.)

There is something I noticed this time around, that started when I had Sofia and continues today, now centered more around Ellie. I am speaking of an uncanny ability to envision the most horrific dangers that could possibly ever happen to my children. Let me share some examples;

A normal person might be afraid to drop a baby–a valid concern. A Mother’s fear is more like being terrified of tripping whilst wearing the baby bjorn and landing on said baby resulting in a head squashed like watermelon on the pavement.

Pretty fucked up huh?

Once you become a mother, in the back of your mind, you fear the worst…

 

There are some more obvious fears like SIDS, which for me manifests itself in a slightly weird noise heard over the monitor that was probably nothing but what if it’s choking and I don’t get out of bed to check then she dies and it’s all my fault.

Sunburns=cancer potential

Accidentally feeling a buzz from dinner wine (as a breastfeeding mommy)=BAS (Baby Alcohol Syndrome) which is probably not real, but I feel potentially guilty for anyway.

 

I suppose this is what they call “motherly instinct” or also paranoia.

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7 Responses to “The Mother of all Fears”

  1. Helenne Asebez- cousin Says:

    Yep, you have become as full-fledged mom and paranoia never ends once you’ve embraced it….lol….Welcome aboard. Love you, cousin!

  2. tadmack Says:

    Aaaand this is why I have no kids.
    Because I have Scary Thoughts like this all the time, even sans hormone floods. I’m SURE something bad would happen, and it would Scar Me Forever (not to mention the poor dead child). So, go, you, for tromping down your fears of Bjorn butchery, and going forward…

  3. Danielle Says:

    I’ve noticed these fears creeping through my head too. And then I mention them to my husband, who says “are you going to turn into my mom?” (who is beyond unreasonable in her worry-wartishness, and I’ve long deeply disliked that about her). That seems to be enough to stop the crazy thoughts on the spot!


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