Scribbling Dame

Preposterous Pondering.

Oh yeah. Mom. May 4, 2011

Mother’s Day is coming up and before you bitch and complain about having to hang out with your old lady or drop coin on a present for her, you should consider how I suffer on this day–I have 3 mothers to buy for what with Step-mom and birth-mom and mom-in-law. I can’t get past a holiday like this without dropping at least $100 and that is on the cheap!

In my hustle and bustle to buy cards, have the kid scribble in them, find a stamp and order affordable, somewhat personalized gifts that won’t end up in a donation pile, I mentioned my process to a multitude of friends whose response was, “Oh. It’s Mother’s Day?”

Apparently I have been far too good of a daughter. Almost none of my friends do more than a card or phone call for their moms on Mother’s Day. To which I think–damn, how did I miss the memo? To which I also think, what a bunch of ungrateful bastards!

On the one hand I get it–it’s a pain. On the other hand, even if your mom was a shitty mom, my guess is you were still an inconvenience yourself at one time. Be it squeezing you out of the old birth canal and ruining a carefree slutty lifestyle or being a terror as a toddler, or a horrible teenager–your mom probably put up with shit from you at some point–the least you could do is cook a breakfast or put some thought into a trinket. At the very least, shitty mom taught you some valuable life lessons. At the best, if you had a decent mom who tried hard, royal treatment is in order (just think of how much you saved on therapy!)

Plus, whatever effort you put forth for your mother will be the same put forth for you from your kids. I don’t know about you, but I could use at least a day every year where my kid thought about making me happy–hopefully more!

Wow. That was quite a soap box. Now go make your mom a home-made card.

Deliver some goods like your mom delivered you!


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